Bittersweet

The other day I walked through the automatic doors at Walmart only to be assaulted by the "Back to School" campaign. Large signs suspended from the ceiling, Massive bins of Elmer's glue, Crayola Crayons, safety scissors, packs of pencils and pens, notebook paper, construction paper, rulers, etc. Then I was punched in the stomach with the fact that this is my last year with Corwin at home. And this morning, as I read so many of my friends' and family's Faceook posts, I am again reminded that my firstborn will soon be a kindergartner.

I have mixed emotions. On one hand, I am excited and anxious for him to start. For one, he will love school! He is inquisitive and hungry for knowledge. He is sharp on both an intellectual and social level. He is confident, bold, and strong. He will have no fear entering those double glass doors. Secondly, life will be considerably easier for me at home. Some time with just Owen and me together, alone, is appealing. Corwin and I were exclusive for three years, and now I will have that precious time with my second child. But, on the flip side, I am sad to see him go. This means he's growing up--becoming more in independant, and making more choices on his own. This means I have to trust what we've taught him the first five--almost six--years of his life. This means I have to trust God in a way I've never had to before.

I am incredibly thankful for the ability to be at home with my boys the first 5-6 years of their lives. We have had to sacrifice a lot of things for me to stay home--my sense of individuality, my work, the additional income, and living without a lot of things that others around us have. But, God has blessed, and I believe we will see the results for years to come.

So, here's to one more year! May God bless it indeed!